QUESTION: "Does each person have an 'other half'? Like a missing piece/side - like Eve was to Adam? Also, do you normally meet this person in each life time if you go through more than one?"

ANSWER: Yes, the complementary part of one's soul. Ideally it should happen in each life time, but this can be affected by the relative merits of the two people. This is discussed in our Gate of Reincarnations series.


QUESTION: "How can the Kabbalah help in finding a soul-mate? Is there a special prayer that can be read for soul-mates' union or other rituals and practices? How can a Jewish woman use the Kabbalah to bring her and her soul-mate together?"

ANSWER: There are no magic formulas or instantaneous solutions. Beware of anybody who would sell one to you.
All we can do is make the effort to increase our merit in G‑d's eyes. Give extra charity, intensify in mitzvah fulfillment and Torah study. An especially propitious time for prayer in this matter is just before lighting your Shabbat candles. Give a coin (at least) to charity first. Also, take on some of the Kabbalah emphasis on "kavana" - focused attention and concentration on the mitzva deeds you do and the words of prayer and Torah that you say. This will increase your spiritual sensitivity as well as your merit, which will certainly lead to the successful fulfillment of the above stated quest, hopefully soon.


QUESTION: "How can I tell if I have truly met my soul mate, and can I pray for a particular person?"

ANSWER: You can and should pray that you will meet your soul mate and that you will recognize him (otherwise known as "the right person at the right time").
To pray that a particular person should turn out to be your soul mate is a classic case of a prayer in vain. Who your soul mate is has, by definition, already been determined. So you would be praying for something that already is and can't be changed - like praying over a fetus in the eighth month that it be a particular gender.


QUESTION: "Is there a way I can have my fortune read to ask about a certain person in my life, and where my relationship with her is going to go? Can't a Kabbalist tell your fortune?"

ANSWER: Not in legitimate Judaism there isn't. A Kabbalist fortune-teller is a contradiction in terms and therefore a fake. At your own risk!


QUESTION: "Does the Kabbalah hold any mystical remedies for bad skin (acne), weight loss and finding one's zivug quickly?"

ANSWER: No. Kabbalah is not magic. Beware of anyone who promises you miraculous remedies. From what you write, it seems that a healthful diet would take care of at least two if not all of the stated problems.


QUESTION: "I am 23 yrs old and, I am looking to fulfill my purpose in life. I am very spiritual and try always to help others, yet I always I feel a lack of purpose in my life. I have been invited to travel to meet men for the purpose of getting engaged, but I think that before getting married I must be at peace with myself. So I am looking to see what type of job or activity I can do everyday to feel satisfied. I haven't found anything; I want to work in something that brings me joy and happiness. What is best, to find a job and then look for a guy, or to find a guy and then see what to do?"

ANSWER: This is a good and important question. My opinion is you should turn towards marriage. Acquiring a job rarely produces inner joy or satisfaction, while finding your soul mate and building a home nearly always does. Good luck.


QUESTION 1: "I am 33 years old and 4 weeks ago lost my husband to cancer. I have been consoled by countless people who have told me that my husband's soul is still around "watching" over me and my 2 young sons. Is this true? If it is, then, does his soul retain his mind?"

ANSWER 1: Maybe, maybe not, although it is probably better for his soul to not be connected to down here. There is no one rule that applies to all souls. Nevertheless, his soul is certainly prepared to be a conduit for your and your sons' prayers.

QUESTION 2: "Also, I have always been told that a person has only one soul mate. I love my husband so much that the thought of loving another is incomprehensible. Can a person have 2 soul mates?"

ANSWER 2: The Ari says that sometimes a person has a double soul mate - that is, the soul is split between two.

QUESTION 3: "If they can't, then I hope my husband didn't die for me to find my other true love."

ANSWER 3: No, of course not. We presume he died because his soul had finished its assigned tasks for this lifetime.

QUESTION 4: "If the answer to any of these questions is reincarnation, well then, where is my husband now, and when does reincarnation actually take place?"

ANSWER 4: No way to know. No one answer fits every case.


QUESTION: "How to get over a broken heart?"

ANSWER: Good question! Clearly she is not the one you are supposed to marry. But only if you open yourself to proceed in your life will you be able to meet the right one.
Prayer helps, and so do clear goals, which you can move towards accomplishing in incremental steps.


QUESTION: "I have a very sensitive question to discuss. I am 22 years old, have just graduated from college, and started to work full-time. Naturally, the next step would be to "shidduch" date until my destined soul mate is found. Admittedly, I have gone on very few dates (less than 10 over the last 2 years). And, after one date per girl I usually get the same response, in one form or another. I feel lost to an extent, and also feel that the matchmakers aren't doing the job they are supposed to be doing.

Why am I posting this on a Kabbalah-related website? Simple. I know that according to Kabbalah/ Chasidut, G‑d designates everyone's soul mate, but at the same time each of us has to make an effort to find and be found. I also know that every failed shidduch leads each person one step closer to finding ones destined spouse. But, isn't there a purification process that a person can go through in order to speed up the process? Before I continue judging others, I would like to first judge myself and see where I'm going wrong, which may as a result affect my spiritual growth as well as meeting my pre-destined soul mate at the prescribed time. Is there anything I should do before delving into specifics? Thanks."

ANSWER: The best context for "cheshbon hanefesh" - an honest soul-accounting - is Kriyat Shema al HaMita – the prayer before sleep, especially on Thursday nights and Erev Rosh Chodesh.

That said, I must also say that I don't necessarily accept your assumption that you have been "going wrong". You haven't met the right person yet, and before you graduated college and started working certainly doesn't sound like the right time. If you feel you are not getting appropriate response from professional matchmakers, you can always ask friends for suggestions. Many prefer that anyway.

Looking forward to hearing some good news from you.